Moving Day

Hello Everyone,

I am leaving my first area, what a sad day. Tomorrow, I will be packing up and going down to Port Isabel, apparently the most beautiful part in the mission right on the water. I will be Senior Companion and will finish training a new missionary. I am not sure if I am ready for this or if I even have the skills necessary to do this but when we receive a call from our Mission President, we just go. 

I remember driving into this town (of Laredo) almost 5 months ago. My companion and I were new to the area. I was brand new to the mission field, a bundle of nerves and excitement. I am not sure I really ate for the first three weeks of my mission. We had no investigators, none of the members knew the missionaries, especially not the less actives in our area. It was hard to find people to teach, hard to gain the trust of the members. Virtually, no members wanted to go out with us or even meet with us. No one was feeding us so we just girded up our loins and got to work.

First, we got to know all the members, asking, “what they were doing to support missionary work in their area?” Then asking, "what had been done with missionary work in the past?" As we began to get to know the members we had more and more members not hanging up the phone when we called them. The members actually began to come out and see how making sacrifices of their time actually helped and gave them more energy.

We now have more than enough meal appointments, and people asking us to take them out to appointments. We are receiving referrals for family and friends of the members in our area. Members are begging for us to call them when we need rides. As the members take more of a role in missionary work they feel the fire and importance of bringing more souls unto Jesus Christ.

With the help of members we now have a family that is going to be baptized in this month and the niece of one of our members will be baptized in March. I have really seen this branch grow in their effort to assist in missionary effort. It has been slow as they and I as a new missionary have made tons of mistakes and more to learn about missionary work, but everyday my heart is changing.

I am learning to love more, have less pride, have more charity, be more fun, and stress less. These things are hard but as my heart begins to grow closer to that of the Lord's my desires change. The mission is hard, stressful and at times you want to quit but that is when the miracles happen. That is when the blessings occur if we can just hold on a little longer. A mission is one of endurance, a year and half of loving people, even your companion, and fully focusing on the Lord.

As in life there will be ups and downs but if we can learn from them we might yet be perfect "even as Christ was perfect." I invite you all to endure the race of life with patience seeing the good that comes from every trial that is placed before us.

Con Amor,

Hermana Zani

Another Week in Laredo

Hola Mis Amigos!!

Here I am, another week in Laredo! I love Laredo so much! I love the people in this town. They really are wonderful. I have heard that you will always have a special place in your heart for the first place that you serve in your mission. I am not sure how long I will be in Laredo, but I hope that as long as I am here, that I love it.

This mission is hard some days. Sometimes you do everything that you can to help people to unto Christ and at the end of the day they do not make that choice to come closer to Jesus Christ. They choose not to get baptized. They choose not to come to church. They choose not to accept the blessings that come from making a baptismal covenant with God. They choose not to get married or move out of their house so that they are obeying the laws of God.

I know that through all these disappointments that I am suppose to grow. I know that I am supposed to gird up my loins and move on but sometimes during those quiet hours as I lay in my bed. I just take a moment to grieve those little losses. However, behind every sad moment, every disappointment comes a small miracle. Those small little miracles are what help me know that my efforts where not in vain.

Some days the miracles are hard to see. Other days the miracles are quite obvious. All these miracles remind me who is in charge. It is the Lord. He is guiding and directing this work, not me. He is the one that has something for me to learn at this time in my life with my companion in this area. However, I feel like many times I am not sure what that is until after I am done.

The weather here in Laredo is beginning to get hot. The last few days have been in the 80s and by March we should start seeing the 100s occur regularly. Not sure if I am ready for the summer here but ready or not it will come and like life I will approach it one step at a time. Learning that whatever God gives me I can handle, that is the biggest thing I am learning is to put the Lord first. I am so prideful and think sometimes that I can handle things on my own but that is the biggest falsehood I have ever heard or known.

The Lord guides us and directs us but we have to allow him to do that for us. I invite each of you to look at your life and see what areas of your life you can let the Lord directs you in.

Con Amor,

Hermana Zani

From January 17

Hola Mis Amigos,

As I think about everything we are doing in the Country Club area of Laredo, I think about balance and love. How do balance and love go hand in hand?

Many times I feel overwhelmed thinking all the different factors of missionary life that go into strengthening the ward/branch and helping the Harvest of the field. There are needs, there are so many needs here. There are the needs of my investigators, the needs of those individuals waiting to be found and have not yet been found. There are needs of members, needs of less actives, and needs of recent converts. There are even needs in companionship. How do we come to balance all these needs?

Sometimes I wonder if I am reaching everyone’s needs. I have come to the conclusion that all I can do is to Love each and every person in my area. I have to love the members, less actives, recent converts, investigators, and those still left to be found and as I love them I will do all in my power the help them come unto Christ.

I am also learning that happiness comes a long way in helping people come unto Christ and that only my own sometimes fears stop me from becoming the best missionary that my Father in heaven needs for me to become. As I think about the investigators that we are teaching. I want to know what else can we do to help them come to Christ.

The other night I was up for three hours just praying to know how to reach our January goal that we have committed to the Lord. I received some inspiration and presented a plan to my companion. She did not have the same feeling about the plan and I began to doubt my faith in the revelation I had but the thing is my faith cannot be dependent upon others.

I am growing, however slow it might be and I am coming to learn that when we truly love with all of our heart then balance tends to come. I invite all of you to begin to search for ways that you can love more to help find the balance in life.

Con Amor,

Hermana Zani

Hello again!

Hola Mis Hermonos,

I have been thinking a lot about the sweet people that we meet that do not keep their appointments. I have been thinking about all the late nights I have had not sleeping thinking about what I can do for those that I am teaching. I have been thinking about all the missionaries in my area who love and are willing to diligently serve the Lord. I have been thinking how I can serve others more.

I have found that I love God and always considered myself to be someone who really knew how to serve that Lord but coming on a mission is pushing me to a new level. I see now more than ever just how selfish and self-serving I have been in my life. At no other time in my life have I worked so hard to help others come to accept and understand the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

On Saturday I was tired, really tired. I felt like a walking Zombie and just hoped that I could keep going. I was not sure what I was going to say. I just kept pushing through everything. I kept pushing through life. I knew that Jesus Christ would not quit if he was tired so I just kept moving forward. And I know that because I keep moving forward even though times were hard and tough, I moved forward with faith and because of my faith I was able to see miracles. Not like mountains moving or anything like that but miracles.

My invitation to all is to keep moving forward having faith in Christ and he will make you more than you are.

Con Amor,

Hermana Zani

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

I hope that everyone had a happy and safe New Year's. 

On New Years Eve, for safety reasons, we all had to be inside of our apartments early and by early I mean 8:00 pm! But before our early arrival back into our home we had a zone meeting (which basically means that we had a meeting with all of the missionaries that live in the City of Laredo). For this meeting we watched the movie “17 Miracles” which was a remarkable representation of the Willy Handcart Company (a group of pioneers which made the journey from the east coast to Salt Lake City, Utah). These pioneers left late in the year and faced an early winter. These pioneers faced incredible hardship but maintained their faith.

When I see movies or hear stories of people that maintain this kind of faith in the midst of adversity, my own faith grows and increases. I know that my mission is nothing like the hardship that these pioneers faced and that gives me faith. I am learning to rely more on the Lord. I am learning how to not get frustrated. I am learning that what we struggle with most in other people is the thing that we struggle most with our self.

I love you and hope that everyone's life is returning back to normal after the business of the holidays.

Con Amor,

Hermana Zani

Christmas Blessings

Hello Friends!

As we approach the New Year, I have been reflecting on many things. I have been thinking about my Spiritual life and how over the past few months I have come closer to Christ than ever before. I have always been a loving person and considered that a strength of mine but on a mission I have had to really work on Charity to love the people of Laredo as Christ would love them.

I often think about what would Christ say to this family. I remember sitting in a lesson with a family this past week and just remember thinking I am not sure what I am going to say to this family. I remember thinking I need to teach them about faith, repentance, baptism, and receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost, but I not sure quit how. As I said a little prayer to myself, I remember just feeling peace and just been given the words to say.

There are so many times on my mission that I have been so focused on what Heavenly Father wants for each one of his children that I have felt this overwhelming since of peace. While there are other moments on my mission that I feel so anxious, more anxious than I have ever felt in my life before like my heart is going to close up. But those feelings of anxiety eventually leave and then come and then leave again.

This is how my days have been recently. Needless to say I have been tired this week. I do however, always have joy the joy the gospel brings.

Much love,

Hermana Zani

Christmas

Hello Friends,

I cannot believe that in five days we will celebrate the Birth of our Savior and Redeemer, the Lord Jesus Christ. He is the rock and the foundation of everything in our lives and it is through him that we can have eternal life and everlasting happiness’s.

As I approach my first of two Christmas' in the mission field. I want to pause and take a moment to express my gratitude, to all those that have helped me to get to this point in my life where I am serving a mission. I am thankful for all those I have meet and worked with me on my mission. I am grateful for the many lessons that I am learning on my mission even though they may be hard and tough at times. I am learning and growing lots even when I cannot always see it. I know that the Lord is molding me into the person I need to become.

I have been thinking about the process of "unconditional surrender" where we surrender everything that we want, desire, or need over to the Lord and that by doing that we allow ourselves to become like the Savior. His desires become our desires, his wants becomes our wants, his needs, become our needs. Yesterday, while standing outside in the cold and in the rain. I thought about this as my feet felt numb and my hands were freezing. I felt the urgency to talk with more people, to work harder to find more people to teach. To care more about bringing a family unto Christ than listening to my own voice of tiredness.

 I know that when I can surrender my all to the Savior and become more like him then I will be on track to becoming the missionary that the Lord needs me to become. I knew that I would be pushed and tried on my mission but I did not know how personal these challenges would be. I think that is how a mission works, we are placed in situations and with people that cause us to grow and to progress.

I encourage you all to take time and think about how the Lord has blessed you through your challenges this year. How have you grown personally because you were faced with a difficult task.

I wish you all a safe and warm Christmas. Remember to read Luke 2 and reflect on the Saviors birth during this Christmas season.

Con Amor,

Hermana Zani